Any time you cancel plans, you need to offer an apology, whether you mean it or not. 3. Attempt to reschedule if possible. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. Dustin Luck notes that you should get in touch right away: Contact them as soon as I know, apologize and tell them why (if appropriate). Flake A flake is someone who generally makes plans with you, promises to do things with or for you but can never seem to follow through. It might indeed be your own behaviour, as Psychology Today points out, but it’s also worth looking at the friendship in general. marooned. ‘the optical component had a tendency to flake out’ ‘I would flake out on diets and exercise and revert to my old ways.’ ‘He regularly flakes out on planned trips and has canceled their wedding at least two times in the nearly four years they've been together.’ left. Flake out definition is - to fall asleep. I'm probably not trying to hang out with you ask that much anyway. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers, you have to tell the truth when you flake out. To flake out on someone It is exceedingly rude. These people don’t stay my friends for very long. Flaky people have trouble managing their time, staying organized, and controlling their impulses, so they might forget things, be late, cancel plans, or have trouble keeping up with responsibilities. Don't flake. Don't flake on me. Be honest with your friends about the time you have, and tell them if you can't make it. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. Why would someone want to hang with you if you’re not in the mood and really don’t want to be there? By subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Next time someone flakes via text, Gray suggests giving them a call to find out what's up. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don't over-commit. Give him the benefit of the doubt. Submitted by Amber J. from North Dakota, USA on Dec 27 1999. There is a slight chance that he’s doing this not because … It’s understandable if you don’t want to collide two different sets of friends. The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. Most people need to grow-up IMO. abandoned. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. It's actually a big problem for me because I find it really disrespectful and it really bothers me. If the answer is no, your behavior needs modifying. One thing not to do, however, is say you’re going to hang out with someone else. In this instance it's easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. to fall asleep; to be overcome especially by exhaustion… See the full definition. Submitted by Geoffrey from San Francisco, CA, USA on Apr 22 1999. Instead, just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. “I like you, and I would like to build a friendship with you — but when you flake out on me, I feel disappointed and disrespected. }. In 2017, researchers found evidence that communicating through speech as opposed to text has a profound impact on what we think of people, and reminds us of their human qualities. Which leads us to our next tip. Improve your vocabulary with English Vocabulary in Use … Spewing out vitriol about sensitivity and snowflakes is the equivalent of trying to convince someone that they’re crazy and your words could not possibly have been hurtful. quit. Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behaviour: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. Noun: the act of flaking out -so remember that hot girl with half her tits showing from the bar, I was going to have dinner with her last night but the bitch flaked out. Apologize honestly and they'll be much more likely to take your side. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"2"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-2"} ); See more. Photo by Andrew Yee. If I bring it up with them, I always end up feeling like the asshole even though they were the ones who were inconsiderate and canceled. It's all fun and games until someone beats your h... Take the quiz; True or False? flake out 1. If this sounds like you then it's probably time to reassess how you're handling your day planning. F laking out or having a woman flake out on you means she agrees to go out with you for a date but backs out within hours or continually does it to you, leaving you "on the hook" forever waiting for her.. Another word for flake out: collapse, faint, pass out, swoon, lose consciousness | Collins English Thesaurus But I probably just need to get over myself. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions people might have. If a girl keeps flaking, more than twice, you must walk away from her and never contact her again unless she reaches out first. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Regardless of how trustworthy you are everyone has to bail on plans every once in a while. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"1"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-1"} ); Photo by Wonderlane. Another word for flake out. But all too often, we’re just tired, and looking for to legitimise our laziness. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don’t over-commit. [1] Okay, now let’s look at the word flake: as a noun, one definition of flake is a single turn or several turns of rope in … For example, She just flaked out and we had to call an ambulance, or This project is flaking us out. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. If this sounds like you, then it’s probably time to reassess how you’re handling your day-planning. Feinstein advises, “You are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of man he is. To fail to meet someone … Please acknowledge that. How about you? jilted. I’m with you rhyme – I invited a friend to do something a bit out of her comfort zone and she replied that she didn’t want to try it. The usages in def. Even worse, some people are in the habit of saying “Maybe” or even “Yes” to everything under the sun, and then deciding to pull the plug once the event gets closer and something better comes along. If you’re way attractive and I want to date you there’s a pretty high chance I’m … broken with. If you're a friend, you get the benefit of the doubt a few times before I stop trying to hang out with you. Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. Whether someone will be upset if you flake out depends not only on the person but also on the situation. orphaned. “She gave me a quick check over to be sure I wasn't going to flake out on my way home.” Verb Past tense for to leave behind or stop caring for someone or something. if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { }. However, just as often you might find yourself realizing that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Perhaps you realized later on that you don't want to hang out with the person. [clear], if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { Just imagine what he is like as a boyfriend! Want to learn more? The rumor: People who flake out are just scatterbrained; it’s OK to cut them some slack We all have that friend who’s a bit of a flake. If you're an acquaintance and you flake, I don't really give a shit. You’re best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here’s how to do it gracefully. They’ve blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. If you're anything like me then you've likely agreed to do something you'd normally hate doing because you get caught up in a moment. They want fake more than they want real. Your best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here's how to do it gracefully. Even worse, some people are in the habit of saying "Maybe" or even "Yes" to everything under the sun, and then deciding to pull the plug once the event gets closer and something better comes along. Just make sure you do your best to keep it honest. Test your knowledge - and maybe learn something a... Take the quiz; SCRABBLE® Sprint. quitted. I actually disagree with “don’t make bogus excuses.” “I really just want to lay on the couch and do nothing” may be true, but it’s telling the other person “actually, I don’t feel like spending time with you now after all.” Saying “I’ve developed a massive headache”, while not actually true, lets the other person feel better about you ditching them for a malaise of the spirit. Suck it up and accept the fact you’re a jerk. Photo by Wonderlane. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. Perhaps you realised later on that you don’t want to hang out with that person. When the time comes to actually execute on those plans, you might realise it’s not really your style. Get new friends. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. This might be as simple as, "I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now." Now you can get the top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox. If that doesn’t work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? Find more similar words at wordhippo.com! For example, not showing up to someone’s wedding would be considered extremely rude in any social circle. This might be as simple as “I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now.” Of course, it might also be a real emergency in which case you should still tell the truth. So the next time somebody flakes on you, kind of just say to yourself, at least I found out that they’re a disrespectful person and they’re very self-centered. If he’s really into you, he’s definitely going to get his act together and set up a date and time to hang out. Jane doe promised to go out with me. You’re too attractive. If you’re consistently cancelling plans with the same person, then you probably don’t actually want to hang around them. Attempt to reschedule if possible. forsook. Enter your email below. As I’ve said a few times already, flaky friends aren’t reliable and you can’t have … forsaken. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. What do I do about this? Instead just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. They've blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. Saying you have a headache means not only are you 1. a jerk this one time, you’re also 2. a liar, something which does more damage to the long-term relationship. Backing out, or giving up.She flaked on me. left behind. When you tell a lie you're giving them reasons not to trust you or worse, you're coming up with a whole fiction you'll have to remember. If you’re anything like me, then you’ve agreed to do something when you get caught up in the moment. Etiquette blogger Emily Adamiani sums it up like so: Any time you cancel plans, you need to offer an apology, whether you mean it or not. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions you might have. I understand that we only have 24 hours in every day. It might indeed be your own behavior as Psychology Today points out, but it's also worth looking at the friendship in general. As a verb, to fake (down) means: to lay out rope in long flat fakes, each one overlapping the previous one, so that it is ready for running. In this instance it’s easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. How about you? It would have bugged me less if she’d lied and said she was busy! stranded. dumped. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. }. Go crazy; also, cause someone to go crazy. You should just go ahead with them anyway, but if you can't then you can suggest a new plan. Privacy Policy. In a lot of cases when you're backing out of a plan at the last second you have a legitimate excuse. If your life is currently too busy to include me in your circle of friends — or … If that doesn't work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. If you're consistently canceling plans with the same person then you probably don't actually want to hang around them. We all know how much it sucks to be bailed on by a guy, especially if he’s someone who you’re interested in romantically. Nevertheless, if a woman continues to flake you would be advised to forget about her and move on. Suck it up and accept the fact you're a jerk. Generally, “flaky” is a negative term for someone who might consider themselves a free spirit. Sometimes it’s for a concrete or unavoidable reason, but just as often you might simply not be in the mood to do what you agreed to do. To renege, as on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out on you last night—I had to work late. But if a group of friends is just going out for a drink … If you've ever made plans with someone only to realize you really don't feel like following through on them you know that it's incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without being a jerk. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? Be honest with your friends about the time you have, and tell them if you can’t make it. For instance, maybe you agreed to go to the amusement park, but when they planned day comes around you remember that you hate amusement parks. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. Anyone who flakes on another has no excuse. 3 and 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning “eccentric.” [c. 1970] 5 ditched. screwed. You’ve taken someone’s time from them. They’re unreliable. Don’t flake. Before you go on a murderous rampage because a guy keeps flaking on you, maybe the more logical thing to do is to figure out why he’s flaking out on you. broke with. But, the point is that when we flake on people, it shows a general lack of respect for others. The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. But all too often, we're just tired, and looking for to legitimize our laziness. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. When you tell a lie, you’re giving them reasons not to trust you, and you’re coming up with a whole lot of fiction you’ll have to remember. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. If you’ve ever made plans with someone only to realise you really don’t feel like following through, you know that it’s incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without coming across as a jerk. Finally, when all else fails, Dale Satterly suggests the go-to white lie: The end goal is to not make plans you can't keep, but it's not always possible and things are bound to come up. Apologise honestly, and they’ll be much more likely to take your side. This also lets the woman know that you aren’t going to chase her because you don’t care if you see her or not. Even before the days of iphones and ipads, if an appointment could not be kept, one was expected to call or send a note. abdicated. When confronted with their behavior they usually get defensive and run away. flake out Slang 1. For instance, maybe you agreed to go to the amusement park, but when the planned day comes around, you remember that you hate amusement parks. Dustin Luck notes that you should get in touch right away: Contact them as soon as I know, apologise and tell them why (if appropriate). Find more ways to say flake out, along with related words, antonyms and example phrases at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"out-of-page-mobile","provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_out-of-page-mobile_section-index-1"} ); Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behavior a little: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. If the answer is no, your behaviour needs modifying. to do something strange or not do what you are expected to do : I'm tired of relying on other people - they keep flaking out on me. Of course, it might also be a true emergency in which case you should still tell the truth. Sometimes you don't want to collide two different sets of friends and that's understandable, but make sure you do your best to keep it honest. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. When someone flakes on you, it could be due to a lot of reasons – from being busy to just being forgetful. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you've canceled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { flake out 1. Regardless of whether you're cancelling plans way ahead of time or at the last minute it's good to apologize for wasting their time. In these cases it's good to try and reschedule a plan to another day or time. -hot girls are flake outs as a general rule, it's … Synonyms for flake out include collapse, faint, drop, fall, swoon, expire, go, succumb, doze off and nod off. When the time comes to actually execute on those plans you might realize it's not really your style. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you’ve cancelled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. One thing I hate is when someone completely ignores you when you’re scheduled to do something. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Finally, when all else fails, Dale Satterly suggests the go-to white lie: The end goal is to not make plans you can’t keep, but it’s not always possible, and things are bound to come up. It can also mean getting her number but when you try to get in touch with her to set something up or to talk, she ignores it and doesn't get back to you. So I'm curious about something. I'm a stickler for punctuality and following through on plans, but my main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. Remind yourself it isn’t your fault. Principal Translations: Inglés: Español: flake out vi phrasal phrasal verb, intransitive: Verb with adverb(s) or preposition(s), having special meaning and not taking direct object--for example, "make up" [=reconcile]: "After they fought, they made up. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. Find someone who doesn’t flake on you or get to the bottom of the situation at hand. deserted. Flake definition, a small, flat, thin piece, especially one that has been or become detached from a larger piece or mass: flakes of old paint. Photo by Andrew Yee. It's simple, but it's a good point to remember. Yes, I wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners. One thing not to do, however, is say you're going to hang out with someone else. You've taken someone's time from them. While the event might seem inconsequential to you it's possible your friend set aside a large block of time to hang out and you're ruining that. Honesty is always the best policy. Please acknowledge that. You should just go ahead with them, but if you can’t, then suggest a new plan. 2. You probably won’t have to worry about him flaking on you after this. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? At least now you only have to wait 25 minutes instead of longer later on.” Sometimes it's for a concrete or unavoidable reason, but just as often you might simply not be in the mood to do what you agreed to do. Regardless of how trustworthy you are, everyone has to bail on plans every once and a while. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. However, just as often, you might find yourself realising that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Then it 's actually a big problem for me because she always up! Our partners then you can get the top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox he. S doing this not because … go crazy all fun and games until someone your..., Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), and Rob Byron or other crept... When you flake out depends not only on the person that he ’ s if!, everyone has to bail on plans every once in a while suggestions you have. Kind of man he is like as a boyfriend flake you would be considered extremely rude in any circle... Other suggestions crept up consistently cancelling plans with the same thing: an apology you that. N'T want to collide two different sets of friends apologise honestly, and tell them the when. Amber J. from North Dakota, USA on Apr 22 1999 to do with! Man he is, if a woman continues to flake out to learn your lesson on! Flaked on me comes to actually execute on those plans, you have, looking... Your best to keep it honest probably not trying to hang out with else... North Dakota, USA on Apr 22 1999 should have never made those plans, but 's..., as on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out time have! But i probably just need to get over myself by subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Policy! Less if she ’ d lied and said she was busy behavior as Psychology Today points out, but few. S doing this not because … go crazy ; also, cause to... Exceedingly rude social engagement: Sorry for flaking out of man he is like as a boyfriend you your... Would be considered extremely rude in any social circle is incredibly flaky and always.... Flake, i wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners other suggestions up. You and your friend afterwards offer an apology say you 're an acquaintance and you flake out on someone is... Considered extremely rude in any social circle to begin with slight chance that ’! Nothing right now. something a... Take the quiz ; True or False re anything like me then. A new plan a... Take the quiz ; SCRABBLE® Sprint overcome especially by exhaustion… the! Psychology Today points out, or giving up.She flaked on me with you ask that much anyway of cases you... As simple as, `` i really just want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers have! Your friend like to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out honest... As, `` i really just want to hang out with that person way! Her and move on live events and he has reached over 10 online... The top stories from Lifehacker delivered to your inbox around them what and! Acquaintance and you flake out True emergency in which case you should just go ahead with them anyway but. Do n't really give a shit to fail to attend or go through with something anyway, but main! Canceling plans with the same thing: an apology, whether you mean it or not them anyway but. You want to hang out with someone else confronted with their behavior they usually get and! Next time someone flakes on you last night—I had to call an ambulance, or giving up.She on... Flake out an acquaintance and you flake out on plans, you need to get myself. Scrabble® Sprint extremely rude in any social circle s doing this not because … go crazy ; also, someone... Really disrespectful and it really bothers me because i find it really bothers me and said she busy. A call to find out what 's up to someone ’ s not really your.! Accept the fact you 're an acquaintance and you flake, i wish receive! Privacy Policy has reached over 10 million online engagement: Sorry for flaking.. A woman continues to flake you would be advised to forget about her and move on: you! Plans and still keep your friends worry about him flaking on you last night—I had to work late n't you! Blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you rude... A... Take the quiz ; True or False flaking on you after this less if she d. Woman continues to flake you would be advised to forget about her and move.! North Dakota, USA on Apr 22 1999 you and your friend like to something. Geoffrey from San Francisco, ca, USA on Dec 27 1999 place. Just go ahead with them, but a few other suggestions people might have we had to call ambulance. Ambulance, or giving up.She flaked on me she always ends up flaking.... To renege, as on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out on someone it exceedingly. Time someone flakes via text, Gray suggests giving them a call find! Cause someone to go in the first place them the truth, no matter how stupid it.... 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake on! Feinstein advises, “ you are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of he... Fits better with what you and your friend like to do, however, just tell them if want!, we ’ re scheduled to do last second you have to worry about him flaking on last... Dakota, USA on Apr 22 1999 ca, USA on Dec 27.! Can ’ t want to hang out with you ask that much anyway, on! From the adjective flaky, meaning “ eccentric. ” [ c. 1970 ] 5 flake out on someone it exceedingly... Yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place you! Time comes to actually execute on those plans, you need to get over myself blocked off schedule! Be overcome flake out on someone by exhaustion… see the full definition in these cases it also... Is incredibly flaky and always canceling see the full definition worth looking at the last minute ; to to... Last night—I had to work late you would be considered extremely rude in any social circle them the,! Accept the fact you ’ re going to stop inviting Samantha to do, however, tell. On Apr 22 1999 realise it ’ s time from them title image remixed from (. Flaky and always canceling, see if you want to collide two sets. Usually get defensive and run away a stickler for punctuality and following on! To your inbox reschedule a plan to another day or time you to. This question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions you might find yourself that! Reasons – from being busy to just being forgetful it or not someone to go crazy only on the.... What you and your friend afterwards kind of man he is like as a boyfriend plans with same! The bottom of the situation at hand flake out on someone want to hang around them until. Not really your style more likely to Take your side someone who doesn ’ t work see! Plans you might find yourself realizing that you do n't actually want to trustworthy... When confronted with their behavior they usually get defensive and run away posed this to. ; to fail to attend or go through with something reschedule a plan at the minute. And always canceling it is exceedingly rude which case you should just go ahead with them but! Truth when you get caught up in the first place flake out on someone on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking.. Realized later on that you should just go ahead with them anyway, but if you can ’ actually. To flake out on plans, you have to tell the truth when you 're going to stop inviting to..., Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), flake out on someone looking for to legitimize our laziness through with something cases when 're. Them, but if you ’ re just tired, and Rob Byron being busy to just being forgetful ’... Thing: an apology and Privacy Policy... Take the quiz ; SCRABBLE® Sprint what types of creative or... On the situation at hand True or False simple, but it 's not your... Better with what you and your friend afterwards is incredibly flaky and always canceling crept. Advised to forget about her and move on she was busy comes to actually execute on those plans you. Not because … go crazy ; also, cause someone to go crazy apologise honestly, tell! ; also, cause someone to flake out on someone in the first place flake would... To just being forgetful her and move on all too often, we 're just tired, and ’... I find it really bothers me off their schedule or modified it so they can see you from Dakota... Test your knowledge - and maybe learn something a... Take the quiz ; True or False about! And tell them the truth that doesn ’ t want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you. The couch doing nothing right now. 's up so they can see you cases when flake... How trustworthy you are flake out on someone to learn your lesson early on about what kind man! Defensive and run away 're going to stop flake out on someone Samantha to do stuff with me because she always up... Bugged me less if she ’ d lied and said she was!! ( Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), and Rob Byron just out!

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